Chapter Text
It is finally here...the day that Lucifer Morningstar himself feared has finally come. Extermination day is nothing compared to what today is. Even "Banishment's Day" for Lucifer was a child's play.
"What's so scary about this day then?" Some sinners might ask their king.
And Lucifer would slaughter them for even daring to ask such a question. They would not understand...sinners will never understand that even fallen angels have fears. Yet the answer is simple: today is Charlie's last day in Morningstar's compound after spending her entire childhood there.
...
Why it came to this?
✝Magne Inferno⛧: Episode 1
Chapter 1: As Above, So Bellow
December 15, 2019, AD (16 days before the Extermination), 4:21 PM.
Hell/The Ring Of Pride/The Pentagram City/Outskirts/The Morningstar's Compound
The King of Hell paced back and forth near Charlie's room, his patience running thin as he waited for his daughter. A few times, Lucifer pressed his ear against her door to overhear what she was doing. Some random words and, on some occasions: "Razzle/Dazzle, not here!" came from his daughter.
He would have entered the room already and helped her without any problem. However, Lucifer has recently avoided Charlie's presence like Beelzebub's plague. He could not bear to see her face, knowing she was leaving him. Lucifer was afraid this day would come sooner than he expected. In the fallen angel's mind, he thought "one month is a long time". But time is on God's side. He did not prepare for any of this. Now that it is finally here, he is paying the price for "lack of vision."
With Lilith preoccupied with her concerts, Lucifer was the only one who bore the fruit of the pain. It is odd how his "heart" beats in such rapid motion. He had never expected to be that nervous in his entire existence. The realization of the possibility that he could have been a bad father concerned him, but he was completely unsure. "Guilt" was a slippery slope for the King of Pride. Yet the more he thought about it, the more he kept remembering that specific moment he had with Uriel, particularly the question she posed to him:
"Lucifer, do you hate your father?"
Oh, Uriel. It was hilarious how your question sealed your brother's faith. All he desired were answers. All those years since that unfaithful day. Lucifer did not have a chance to know why. When the Almighty Holy Father announced his plans for the creation of Earth and Heaven. Lucifer's excitement rose like the Morning Star, he was. Compare him now and back then: his excitement was like that of his daughter: so bright, so charming, so naive, and above all...foolish.
Lucifer continued to be that way for the entire time of God's creation, despite not knowing what his dad was doing. No one of his siblings had any idea what their dad's project was all about. Nobody dared question why God was exhausting himself all of a sudden. Ironic, considering their dad loved criticism.
Six days passed before the "premier attraction" began: the creation of Adam, Lilith, and Eve. The news of their "birth" arrived in rapid motion for Lucifer. And oh, boy! These three raised some noise for angels. The Morning Star expected to see Adam and Lilith as something of God's image: beautiful and majestic. But nope, none of that. They did not have any wings or the powers of angels...He admitted they were attractive, which is ironic considering Lilith would become his wife.
Yet he still felt odd about everything. Lucifer did not understand why his dad created the "lesser beings." Why not make them angels? What is the purpose? Why did God need them? All these questions, Lucifer himself addressed to his dad. And what did Lucifer get in return?
"Have patience, my son. Everything will make sense in the end."
And that was Lucifer's downfall. History has the tendency to repeat itself over and over. First, it was him. Now it's Charlie's turn...what got into her head?
This whole "redemption of sinners" project felt...laughable to him. As the prideful father that Lucifer is, he should be proud of Charlie for taking a big step towards fulfilling her dreams. But he can't tell if the idea of redemption is part of her "angelic side" or rather the (AHA, gotcha, father!) move for doing nothing on his part.
Charlie had witnessed the first years of annual exterminations by Heaven way back then. She got confused about how sudden it was. Hell, Purgatory, and Heaven coexisted peacefully for the most part. It was pretty obvious that Lucifer was the one who asked him first what had happened.
But he dismissed her questions. Despite being a 200+ year old demon, Charlie is still not "prepared" for these topics. No need to pollute her mind with Heaven's sh*t. Yet Charlie sure as sh*t inherited a lot from him, stubbornness included. She would not let him slip with her silly questions. And so, their topics of "exterminations" developed into a cycle of:
- Her questions turned into more questions.
- More questions become a demand for an explanation.
- Demand for an explanation into a "Do something, dad!"
- "Do something, dad!" finally to "Fine, I will find my solution!"
He laughed at it. He thought his daughter was overreacting to everything. Charlie's mind is full of rainbows, and no logic whatsoever was easy to brush off considering where they dwelled. She has always done so and will continue to do so...
And she played him for a fool in the end.
A month ago, Charlie managed to convince Seviathan to sell his half-ownership of that rundown casino. It was a surprise, to be sure, but a welcome one. Anything that leaves Leviathan's dynasty in shame is music to Lucifer's ears.
But Charlie did it.
She bought a f*cking hotel!
All by herself!
Lucifer underestimated his little girl's abilities...and now he must pay for his foolishness.
"Always take too long," Lucifer mumbled. He tiptoed towards Charlie's door and knocked on it with his cane. He could have done it with his hand, but, oh well, he was too lazy to do that. "Charlie, my sweetie belle! I know I have the entire eternity to stand here, but could you please hurry up?!"
Lucifer, of course, lied on the last part. All he wanted was for Charlie to leave already. It would be easier for him to cope.
"Just a little more, dad." The muffled voice replied through the wall.
Lucifer hummed in acknowledgment. But in all seriousness, how was he going to ease the tension? It f*cking tickles his nerves.
"Wait a minute...of course!" Lucifer thought to himself. How could he not have realized this earlier? The King of Hell cleared his throat and sucked in fresh air. He then leaned closer to Charlie's door. "And make sure you have everything. The toothbrush as well; there's no reason to exist without it, my rosy sweetheart!"
"Daaad!" Charlie groaned in playful protest. "Do you think I'm going to forget it?"
"What's wrong with me stating it? Here in Hell, one must keep his teeth in decent shape...especially the shark-like teeth." Lucifer shrugged, his mouth turning into a wide smile. To prove his point, he summoned a compact mirror to check his fangs. He smiled to see how bright and beautiful they were. "Take an example from your old timer here. How am I going to mock your Aunt Beelzebub the next time I see her?"
"Uhhh...Inform her to take a bath?"
"... Nah, too obvious. You must think further, my dear.” Lucifer snickered. Credit where credit is due. At least Charlie's humor improved a bit.
"I don't know..." It was the only thing he had overheard from her before she became silent. Lucifer realized she had lost interest in their little game. And so he heaved a deep sigh and unsummoned his mirror.
Fatherdamn you, Charlie. Why must you make everything dreadful for your own "apple" daddy? The atmosphere at the moment felt like he was getting banished a second time. Eh, if Charlie knew how she blessed this forsaken old angel with her existence. Her birth was like a mortal fairy tale: many times he and Lilith tried...no avail. They both knew it would not be possible, yet they tried. It was not fair that Leviathan had grandchildren. Even that raging f*cker has his kid...though his "child" was a product of rape...but it still counted...allegedly.
And the things he had to do to conceive Charlie were shameful. He swore that he was going to see him again, He will rip and tear his primordial-
Oh, right.
Lucifer struck his forehead as a new realization hit him. This whole "Hotel" business made him completely forget about the promise he had made to Lilith way back then. Even before Lilith had to depart for a while, his wife kept nagging him about it for the entire month, and he still forgot about it. It was no secret that Lilith and Lucifer were cursed and unable to have children. It was a generous gift straight from Lucifer's father... f*cking prick!
And as Charlie was leaving, he created all these complicated feelings within him. It's best to tell her about some other things too. This would be a great time to tell her about him.
*The knob clicks*
"Oh, sh*t!"
In a panic, Lucifer dropped his cane by accident. It was too late for him to catch it, so he had to improvise. Lucifer turned away from Charlie's door and stared at the wall, making sure she was none the wiser. He whistled some random tune to avoid raising suspicion.
Charlie's giggling and laughter could be heard before the door sprung open. She was most likely entertained by the sight of Razzle and Dazzle and their enthusiasm for wheeling the heaviest suitcases for their mistress was entertaining enough. Charlie then stopped as she detected her dad...who stared at the wall for some reason.
"Dad?"
Lucifer, in all his enthusiasm, turned to her, sporting a broad smile.
"Why HELLO there, Charlotte! Nice weather, isn't it?" He tried leaning against the end table, not intending to hit the vase, causing it to break on impact. "Whoops! How clumsy-"
He stopped when, all of a sudden, a literal "spirit" left the vase. The little beady eyes scanned the room, noticing Lucifer. Happy to be out of its prison, it shouted "FREEDOM" before it flew through the ceiling. The King of Hell raised his eyebrows at this. He did not remember forcing someone into the vase...you know what? That is not significant right now.
"How convenient! I completely forgot about it. Well, sh*t happens! By the way, do you know what that vase has in common with me?"
"Umm...clumsiness?"
"Nope, we're both fallen....get it?" Lucifer laughed with a nervous tone in his voice.
"Riiiight..." Charlie nodded, although she was still confused by his earlier behavior. "But why were you staring at the wall, dad?"
"Why shouldn't I?" Lucifer boasted. He raised his finger to jab at the specific patterns on the glowing wall, pride being his main sin. "This wall resembles my inner nature, my cupcake. Look at these red waves. It's like a burning passion I harbor for you and your mom."
"Okay...then why is your cane on the floor?" She pointed her finger at it.
"Because I-I-I was TESTING THE GRAVITY! There was a mortal guy who discovered gravity when an apple fell on him or some sh*t.He was mortal, and you could not trust mortals with apples...So, I had to investigate it myself!"
"But what it had to do-"
"Itakeityouready?" Lucifer halted her. He smiled once more with his shark-like teeth showing.
"Oh? Oh, right! Yeah, I'm ready." Charlie nodded, smiling back. She turned around for Lucifer to check her backpack. "I even have my old badges from school."
"Good...but are you sure you've prepared enough, my dear? Things might get ugly, you know." He nudged Charlie in a playful manner.
"Like what?"
"Like~thesuddenattack from Luci-Dad!"
Charlie didn't have a chance to ask as Lucifer began to relentlessly tickle her.
"Dad, S-TO-haha-PIT!" Charlie tried to resist, but she couldn't stop herself from laughing, with the occasions within the chaos pleading with him to stop. Razzle and Dazzle looked at each other with a worried expression, their tiny arms getting tired.
Lucifer then stopped and raised his hands in the air to proclaim the important lesson. "And that's why you must never open your defenses, Charlotte Morningstar!"
"And tickling me was necessary to prove to me that?" Charlie moaned in protest. She wanted more.
"Sugar, I'm Lucifer Bloody Morningstar. It is my part to mingle my fingers with others. Did you know me and Lilith-"
"I don't want to hear it, Dad. You've told me numerous times!" Charlie showed her palms as a signal to stop, not wanting to hear what her dad could do with his fingers to her mom...
"Sorry, pumpkin. I sometimes forget." Lucifer admitted it as his expression turned neutral. He felt as if he had wasted all his "dad" cards. He looked back to where the entrance to their compound was. With no ideas left, he finally accepted that it was over. "Well...no time to waste. Make sure you have everything you need."
Charlie gasped, realizing her clumsiness. "Oh, my dolphins, you're right, pa! Could you please take my suitcase and help Razzle and Dazzle? I'm going to check grab my bag!"
“Sure thing.” He took her suitcase.
"Thanks, Dad!" Charlie gave him a quick kiss on the cheek and rushed back to the room, leaving her dad with Razzle and Dazzle. Lucifer then switched his attention to the two goats. When they saw Lucifer's grin at them, they made squeaking noises as a sign of help.
"Oh no, you don't, slackers! I created both of you to do Charlie's bidding...and speaking of which!"
The King of Hell tossed Charlie's suitcase on top of the heaviest ones. Poor Razzle and Dazzle squeaked more in protest.
"Prepared for trouble, and I made it double. Now chop-chop and to the limousine you go!" He clapped his hands once and pointed his finger at the entrance.
The two reanimated dolls limped at a steady pace towards the entrance with as much energy as they had left. Lucifer hasn't followed them yet. He grabbed his cane and waited (with the patience of a king of hell) for the two dolls to leave first. Only then, in a slow manner, did he walk to the entrance.
With Lucifer, Razzle and Dazzle would make their way to their master's limousine. In the end, though, they both gave up, and Charlie's suitcases collapsed on them. At the same time, Charlie would arrive with the another bag, only to gasp in fear.
"Dad, I kindly asked you to aid them!" Charlie called out in protest, rushing herself to help them.
"And I DID!" Lucifer exclaimed like a proud father, stopping near the toy plushies and his daughter. "But Razzle and Dazzle are heroes that Hell doesn't deserve. To impress you, they begged me to give them my suitcase to prove they were the greatest servants. Isn't it right, boys?"
"Really?" Charlie knelt next to her toys. "You did all of it just to impress me?"
Razzle and Dazzle bit their lips in fear. Their creator put them in an uncomfortable position. They looked back at Lucifer, asking with their stares for permission, to tell the truth. Lucifer, in response, tilted his head and gave them an "I'm going to cleave your heads off if you don't cooperate" glare. The message was clear. So, they nodded to Charlie with all the power they had.
"Awww...you're the best, Razzle and Dazzle!" Charlie gave them a sincere hug. As a bonus for "heroism", she reached for her backpack to give them her baked cupcakes. It's pretty obvious that Razzle and Dazzle ate them in seconds...hungry little boys.
Meanwhile, one of the Lucifer's guards finished the examination of the limo, making sure that it wasn't a...death trip for the princess. Precautions must be made, especially as these...wretched f*cks in other afterlife could have done something stupid for Lucifer and his...sister.
"Everything is ready, my lady."
"Right...thanks, knight." Charlie stood on her feet and glared at her dad. "So... I guess this is it then?"
"It would seem so..." Lucifer smiled, although he could feel himself cracking.
They both stood there, staring at each other, with no one daring to say anything first. Before this, Lucifer wanted to get rid of her, and now he stretches the time for the sake of her staying here longer. Both Razzle and Dazzle felt their presence was not required and went to take the rest of Charlie to pack them into limo. Sometimes they needed to leave Charlie alone...and this was one of those moments.
"Was it...was it like this when you were banished?" Her lips quivered as reality settled in. She didn’t know when it would be the last time she’d see her dad.
"More or less. Didn't have the time to say proper goodbyes..." Lucifer gave a little shrug at the end.
Charlie nodded without saying anything further about it. A brief pause followed before she heaved a deep sigh. "I know we have been fighting a lot...But I will still miss you."
Lucifer did give a nod before laying his hand on Charlie's shoulder. "There is one more thing I want to do before you leave. But first, close your eyes, hon."
Charlie obliged and closed her eyes. She could hear her dad summoning something, which sparked her interest.
"Now open them." His voice sounded as smooth as ever. She opened her eyes and gasped when she saw her dad's genuine surprise. Lucifer held a pink-colored tuxedo jacket, one of the tuxedos he used to wear back in the 1800s.
"But that's yours, dad..." Charlie whispered a weak objection. Her face reddened as tears started to trail down her cheeks.
"And now I gave it to you..." He replied with a rare, soft smile. Lucifer then gestured to turn her around, and Charlie did not hesitate. Her father pulled his tuxedo over her, his hands lingering for a moment as he soaked it all in. He turned her back to him and completely buttoned all the buttons.
"Fits you perfectly, my Morningstar..." He corrected her bow tie and laid his hands on her shoulders. Finally, the King of Hell embraced his daughter with all his passion.
Charlie held on almost all day, trying to think only about her hotel project. Yet she never thought her dad would be capable of piercing her heart. And it broke her. Charlie cried against his neck, sobbing in a few instances, holding him tight. He caressed her back to try to soothe her, but to no avail. Lucifer, on the other side, remained calm. But even he sat at the edge. They needed to finish soon.
Lucifer let go of her completely, much to Charlie's dismay. He moved and flung open the door of the limousine, gesturing for her to take a seat. Charlie now grasped and understood her dad's actions, so she did not object. She made her way to the limousine as slowly as she could, stopping to give one final glare at her dad.
"I love you."
Lucifer opened his mouth to leave out his goodbye speech...only to close it right after. He still decided to at least say goodbye in a more professional manner.
"Goodbye, Charlotte. And remember: don't take sh*t from other demons. Just as I taught you." He closed the door and walked to the front, where the two reanimated toys were waiting. Razzle is on the pedal while Dazzle is on the steering wheel, making his brain wonder for a moment. How is it possible for them to drive a vehicle in the first place?
"You know the drill, you two. Take them to the Happy Casino...and drive safe."
Lucifer backed off and returned to where Charlie is. He raised his hand as a sign of a final goodbye. Charlie barely managed to return it as the Morningstar Guards opened the main gates, with the limousine moved towards the opening. Passing it, the limousine turned left and disappeared from Lucifer's field of vision.
It was over.
He stood here, not moving an inch, for a long moment when they left. Only the mild breeze played with his coat as he stared at the main gate. The King of Hell finally lost the fight with his inner demon. He shed a single tear, which trailed down his cheek, evidence of the pain dwelling. The damned first tear since his banishment.
Lucifer wiped his tears and took a careful glance at his wet finger...he remembered everything.
"Your crimes against Adam and Eve will go unpunished, my son. I'm sorry...but you must leave."
Lucifer's expression tightened, then turned into full anger as he understood the irony:
Charlie questioned her dad.
Like Lucifer questioned his dad.
They both left their homes because of this.
But Lucifer never was clouded.
But Charlie?
Lucifer's own Father did it to her!
Lucifer returned to the Morningstar Mansion and marched up to the second floor. Making his way through a small corridor, he made it straight into his bedroom. He flung the balcony doors open in fury and stopped at the edge, looking up to the sky in rage.
"YOU!" He pointed his finger at a distant planet with a halo on it. "I know you can hear me, so don't even try to ignore me! Charlie was the only soul I loved here in Hell. And you, by your influence, trashed her mind with your "salvation" bullsh*t!" Lucifer then took a breath for a second. "I hope you're so damn happy you took my wife and now you're leaving your granddaughter to fend for herself! So, f*ck you, you pathetic old sack of sh*t! Hope my mom divorces your f*cking nonexistent ass!"
His rant ended with him kicking the beach chair. Lucifer inhaled and exhaled as he stared into Heaven. Nothing happened...
f*cking Dad! Lucifer should have known. He should have known he would "Intervene"...he should have been stricter with Charlie. It is a good thing her idea will fail. There is no way it will succeed...we are all damned for eternity...and that's the end of it....
"I need to take my mind off this sh*t." Lucifer stroked his forehead, thinking of something that might keep him occupied.
...
Scotch.
OF COURSE!
Lucifer smiled as brightly as the sun as he thought about his alcohol. Forgetting about everything, he left his bedroom and went back to the first floor, whistling the Levan Polka tune. After passing through the living room, Lucifer entered the kitchen. Surveying the surroundings, he spotted the specific cabinet he'd been looking for.
"Here you are, my beauty!" He stroked the surface of the cabinet. It was one of his special cabinets. It contained a variety of alcoholic beverages from all over hell, ranging from the Pentagram to Pandemonium and even good old Limbo.
Giggling, Lucifer opened the door, and his mouth dropped to the floor. One of his favorite whiskeys from Caïna is missing. Vampire Demons were well known in Hell for having the BEST alcohol. Losing them was like losing your child...or in other words, SOMEONE STOLE HIS SCOTCH!
"Wait a minute!" Lucifer put his hand to his forehead, considering his options. If Charlie didn't drink, and Lilith didn't care about his liver...
Of course...
"Oh, you little wretched snake!" Lucifer cursed, now realizing the truth. He then returned to the living room, checking every corner to find him. In one instance, he found a small box labeled "Do Not Disturb." It was a jackpot for the King.
"COMFORTABLE ENOUGH FOR YOU?!" Lucifer kicked the box, comment directed at it.
"THE f*ck!" a High-pitched voice emitted inside the box. Then a snake's head emerged from a hole in a box. He looked up and frowned at Lucifer. "Always nice to see your gloomy face, dear brother. What the f*ck do you want?"
"You stole the liquor from me, you sack of sh*t! And judging by how a garden is still not tended, I guess you had a damn hard job today!"
"I-it's Septicemia..." Snake panicked, stuttering very much. "If I overdo it, I get a relapse. It's very serious-"
"Get out of the box!"
"Oh, you can be so testy." Serpent then grinned. "What now, Helel? Constipation?"
With his eerie gait, Lucifer walked over and leaned closer to the Serpent's face. "Guess you're my proof I will never outrun my sins."
"Oh! You have become sanctimonious in old age." Serpent deviated away from Lucifer's face. "No wonder Charlie left you; it's like rooming with Dante Inferno's Lucifer."
Without saying anything, Lucifer smacked Serpent across the head for comparing him to that jerk.
"All right, all right!" Serpent finally got the memo. The snake opened his box and picked up Caïna's scotch with his tail. Lucifer took it away, proclaiming, "Thank you!" before he made his way to the couch and collapsed, sinking into it. He opened the bottle of whiskey and poured it into his cup.
Even in the form of a snake, Serpent understood his brother's sour mood. Bidding a farewell to your daughter was a serious thing, even if you weren't happy with what she was doing. Lucifer needed a little comfort. Thus, Serpent crawled towards Lilith's chair, climbing on top of it and curling almost into a ball.
"OK, tell me; what in Hell's name is wrong with you?"
"f*ck off, Serpent". Lucifer growled back, as he took a sip of his cup.
Serpent rolled his eyes. There he goes again...grumpy old Angel.
"Do you believe in redemption, Lucifer Morningstar? Because I hope and pray to our daddy that one day I will return as a Cherub so that me and Charlie can laugh at you."
"Not you too...There goes another "supporter" of her stupid idea." Lucifer grumbled.
"You, Morningstars, have always pulled the impossible, Helel. 2/3 Angels would agree with me. "
"Oh, please. I had a legitimate reason when it happened. Charlie would never pull the same card. Redemption is a children's fairy tale created by stupid sinners."
"But unlike you, Charlie gets sh*t done. I mean, she bought this casino with her own money! At the same time: all you did was sit on your pathetic ass in a chair, complaining about how everything is not playing by your rules."
Lucifer was about to take another sip, but paused. He looked at him in confusion when he heard the Serpent's last remark.
"What's your point, Serpent?" He asked. He then took another shot of whiskey.
"All I'm saying is be damn proud of your daughter. The girl has a dream. As for you, ever since you got kicked out, you only whine, whine and whine. If Lilith did not marry you, I could not imagine what would become of you."
Lucifer lowered his eyes, glaring at his empty cup. Even if Serpent is a "parasite" in the Morningstar Family. He is still very useful, in his useless way. But he is right. If it were not for Lilith, he would never even become the prideful King of Hell. Who knows what would happen? He would have been cast out by "him" for the sake of other loyal kings of Hell.
Or worse...
"Look at me, Lucifer." The green snake crawled to the table so that Lucifer could see him face-to-face...or, in this case, face-to-snout. "You don't hear me bitching about how our dad turned me into a snake."
"That's because you're busy making excuses for me not to turn you into a purse." Lucifer pointed this out in a sarcastic remark.
"I'm sick, Lucifer. It's Septicemia...it's a slow and painful death, my brother."
"Evidently...and you're a compulsive liar." Lucifer released a breath in annoyance. Serpent still a bad liar to this day. No wonder he turned into a snake so easily.
"Well, my dad told me I'm a "special snake" in this line of work." Serpent showed some humiliation in his tone. Lucifer chuckled at that comment. It's a good thing for the Serpent now that Lucifer is cheering up.
"Yeah..." He nodded slowly. Now that Green snake mentioned, it made him curious. "You never exactly told me what happened after Lilith and I lied to you about the apple."
"Nothing special," Serpent said, waving him off in dismissal. "Michael grabbed my throat and dragged me into Empyrean Palace to our father. Dad asked, "Why were Helel and Lilith in the Garden?" and I replied, "It's free real estate, dad." ...and turned me into what you see now."
"That's our pa." Lucifer raised his cup, cursing his name in a quiet tone.
"Yeah...our mom on another side, though. It's been eons and still I miss her.... every damn day, Helel."
"Yeah, me too," Lucifer admitted as well. He himself could never forget her face...he could never, in all his existence, hate or resent someone like her.
The green Snake looked at Lucifer, lost in his thoughts. He trailed his eyes over the empty cup and got quite an idea.
"You know what?" Serpent crawled closer, gaining Lucifer's attention. "How about we celebrate our girl's departure by opening the bottle of the strongest alcohol? Even if you do not agree with Charlie's project, we could at least celebrate her becoming a woman."
"We should not; I promised to my wife that I won't drink too much. it's a fate worse than death to piss off Lilith."
"Oh, please! She is only like here every two times per-year. Plus, you're the patriarch of the Morningstar Family. Just one bottle would not hurt anybody!"
Lucifer hummed to himself, considering the snake's offer further. He can admit it's a tempting idea. Oh, for f*ck's sake. The word "tempted" is inappropriate due to the whole "Garden of Eden" fiasco that the Serpent caused. But as for alcohol...
"...You got the point. All right, fine!"
Lucifer raised himself and went to the kitchen. A few minutes flew by, and the King would come back with the drinks from the Envy Ring and an (unfortunate) cup for Serpent.
"Huh, I never thought you loved Leviathan's stuff." Serpent commented in slight surprise, although nevertheless eager for it.
"I don't. But it's one the strongest whisky around Hell." Lucifer placed the whiskey and cup on the table. The king opened the bottle and poured it for him and Serpent.
"So..." Serpent wrapped his tail around the cup and raised it with pride. "A TOAST TO OUR FUTURE QUEEN OF ENTIRE HELL, CHARLOTTE MORNIGSTAR. BLESSED ARE THE PEACEMAKERS!"
"For they shall be called the children of God." Lucifer raised his cup and played along. He did not mind, as these words are meaningless. Just some religious mortals came up with some fancy, bloody quotes.
They took a long sip and drank the whole cup to the bottom, ending with a dramatic cup slam on the table.
"Oh, my father. This is some strong sh*t." Serpent commented; he coughed a bit from the savory taste.
"Leviathan sure knows how to make everything salty." Even Lucifer acknowledged that.
They would stare at their cups for a few minutes before they shifted their eyes toward each other. Serpent grinned, knowing Lucifer wanted it too.
"Another round?"
"Eh...fine!" Lucifer shrugged. He poured again, and they drank to the bottom with no problem.
"How about another?"
"Ugh...fine!"
They drank the third round.
"Another?"
"Hit me!"
It was Serpent who poured the fourth round for both, then thefifth and the sixth...and only after the seventh was the whiskey bottle empty.
"f*ck, we're out of booze. WE'RE OUT OF THE BOOZE!" Serpent screamed.
"NEVER FEAR, LUCI-DAN HAS A SOLUTION!" Lucifer slapped his knees and raised himself, almost falling to the table like a drunk fool. But he made his way to the kitchen, grabbing as much alcohol as he could. And so it ensued once more.
Hell/The Ring Of Pride/The Pentagram City/Outskirts/Somewhere not far away from the Morningstar's Compound
"NO AND NO! For the last time, Leviathan. I'm not going to pay compensation to your family. Seviathan brought himself for hurting my Charlie!" Lilith snapped, gripping her hellphone in a vice grip so that he could feel her anger.
The sea monster from the depths of Envy's Ring growled in disappointment.
"Lilith, you should understand that I value my grandson as much as your Charlie. But I will not tolerate her hurting my boy in any capacity. "
"Ahh, so it's her fault now?!" Lilith questioned in rage, furious at such a transfer of arrows to her daughter.
"Why, of course. She was the one who broke our union in the first place, wasn't she? You don't have many "loyalists" in the Stygian Council. Best for you to stick with Von Eldrich's support."
"And what exactly do you want, Leviathan? Make Charlie fall to his knees; give him a blowj*b or something? " Lilith, of course, made a sarcastic remark. Knowing his family, she wasn't surprised if that was the case.
"All I want is one million souls in compensation for losing half of Happy Casino's ownership." Leviathan rolled his eyes. Pride in that woman is a curse for all of Hell. "I could invite your family to my underwater city...as a token of appreciation, Lilith."
"I'm afraid to break it for you, fish boy, but I'm not going to do it! I am the Queen of Hell, and I~"
"I don't care who you are, Lilith. I have the full right to uphold my own ideas and beliefs. And it would be a shame if I had to tell the rest of Hell that YOU have been rather...cordial with the our old-enemies."
There was a short pause as Lilith's face tightened with horror.
"You are bluffing, Leviathan." The Queen challenged back.
"Don't be afraid, my dear. I understand the cost of the deal in the end. Family comes first, after all. That's why I have no intention to reveal your own schemes." The sea monster snickered in delight, hearing her fear. "I hope you understand you have no loyal allies in the Stygian Council. Satan himself hates your guts and the Von Eldritch family is the only thing that keeps your position as "Rulers of Hell" safe."
Leviathan then sat down in his office chair, relaxing on it.
"My offer still stands: give one million souls to my grandchildren, and I will close my eyes to Charlie's misdeeds. As for now, do whatever you want. But know this: It would be a shame to lose your pretty face when Sera will turn her back against you and our mutual dad will rain fire on us during Judgement Day. Until then...have a lovely day in Heaven, parasite. "
Leviathan Von Eldritch was the first to hang up their call. Lilith growled as she wanted to tell him everything with her thoughts grew darker thinking of him. She put her phone down on the limo couch and stared out the window in frustration. Now it is raining in the Pentagram—a rare phenomenon indeed, but desirable.
This day could not get any worse. First Charlie's departure, now this. At least, for the most part, it was finally over. As Extermination Day crept in closer and closer, It was only a matter of time before Lilith could come back to Hell. Her throat was still sore from lack off proper wine... But some Hellish counterpart will fix this in a jiffy.
*Ring*
"What now..." Lilith growled. She didn't have the time nor the politeness to deal with some random schmuck. All she wanted was to be left alone to drink her troubles away. But as Queen of Hell, she had to cope with it. And so she grabbed her phone and accepted the call.
"Queen of Hell is listening." Lilith responded, bored and uninterested in continuing the conversation.
"Lilith! my αγαπημένη βασίλισσα! Long time no speak, eh?!" The female voice on the phone spoke with a Hellenic/Egyptian accent.
Lilith gasped, recognizing the voice of an old friend. "Oh, Indeed. It's been so long, my dear Cleopatra! How are you, my seducing queen of the Nile?"
"I'm good, darling! Sorry for the music in the background. Asmodai Goetia recently arrived and threw another party here in Pride Ring, and I'm down there, just looking pretty."
"I thought he never ends his parties." Lilith checked her nails for a second.
"I know, right?" Cleopatra took a moment to take a co*cktail and drink it before adding further. "But the thing is, he takes a one-minute nap before he gets up and starts partying. You should visit here sometimes, Lilith. We miss the good old days with you!"
"Thanks for the offer." Lilith smiled. "But I'm rather busy with...you know...running Hell."
Cleopatra let out a disappointed sigh. "Shame! You would have ignited the dance floor, my dear. Anyway, I'm sorry if I'm bothering you right now. I just wanted to congratulate you, Lilith! Charlie grew so quickly, didn't she? From a baby girl into a woman. Feels like it's still 1800 AD."
"Thanks...dearie." Lilith replied in a warm tone, although worry still lingered in her voice.
"I'm so proud of you, my Hathor incarnate! It's difficult to bear and care for children, let alone how unpredictable they are as they grow up."
"You don't say. My sister from the Eden family experienced the worst of it."
"So I heard the stories..." Cleopatra nodded, giggling. The Queen of Nile then snapped her fingers as she remembered something. "Say! You don't mind me asking, does Overlord Valentino ever come into the meetings?"
"No, as far as I know. What, you want to kill him or something?" Lilith joked.
"Goodness gracious! Of course not, my queen. As Asmodeus's representative for his interests, I must maintain drug trafficking in the Pride Ring. Recently, his employee had been messing up business. So that is why I am sending some shark goons to deal with the problem. Oh, by any chance, have you tasted the "Angel Dust" drug I created?"
"I don't do drugs, dear. Bad for parenting." The queen smirked.
"Eh, just asking. Anyway, I will not bother you anymore. Give smooches to your husband and his little daughter from me. αντίο, Lilith!"
"You too, Cleo!" Lilith hung up the call. Well, the day wasn't as bad as she thought. It's nice to hear Cleopatra's voice now and then.
Women like Cleopatra, Rosie, Velvet, Vaggie, and the Queen herself were rare occurrences in hell. It was a shame, really. Lilith has different views compared to the rest of the crowd on what system she wants to use for Hell. She saw herself as a demon who believed in turning Hell into a "chaotic yet progressive" afterlife. Making everyone equal in layman's terms. Adam's behavior in Eden was enough for her to see the problem, and she didn't need a repeat of that in her kingdom.
Yet it saddened her. Hell was a complicated mess: a nightmare confederation of many semi-independent duchies, counties, and rings themselves. Nobody listened to her. They feared her, but never listened. Leviathan was a fitting example. To be honest, it's a bit of a prime example. A king who got jealous of their dad's creation of heaven, and thus he created his own "capitalist utopia" in the depths of the Envy Ring.
"My lady, we're arriving home!" Her imp driver called out, steering the limo to the Morningstar Compound entrance.
Lilith sighed in relief. All she needed was her husband's embrace, a few cigarettes, and all the alcohol she could drink. Her own slice of REAL paradise awaited her through the doors of her mansion.
The imp driver honked. The Morningstar Guards opened the gate and gestured for them to drive. The limousine drove past the gates and stopped near the mansion's entrance. The muscular man left the limo, grabbing the umbrella, and opened the limo's door for the queen, giving her an umbrella.
"You may park the limo, Servant." Lilith commanded before, and with no rush, she walked to the main doors. She expected her husband to meet her, considering she sent a message when she would return. Well, it was raining, so she didn't mind it.
While searching for keys in her purse, she listened to her surroundings and noticed the loud polka music and some cheering coming inside the house. Maybe Lucifer was watching the Pentagram-Imp City football match. It wasn't normal for him to be this loud. Finding her keys and opening the door, she ventured inside the mansion.
"Honey, guess who is back?! I'm home!" She cried out. Lilith then laid her purse down and waited for him to come. Only to hear the loud crash of a vase not that far away.
"OH, YOU LITTLE BITCH! COME *hiccup* here!"
"CATCH ME IF YOU CAN, YOU MISERABLE ANGEL!"
"Huh?" Lilith murmured to herself in confusion. She walked over to the living room to see what was going on. "Apple-pie, I heard the com-WHAT IN THE DEVIL'S BALLS IS GOING ON?!"
Lilith could not believe what she saw. Her beloved husband was chasing a snake through the living room like a child. Was this how Lucifer coped with Charlie's departure? By becoming the new "Charlie 2.0"?
The King noticed her and raised his hands in excitement. "Eve, my dear wife! You finally came after so much time have passed...oh, you're so beautiful when you're wet!"
"I'm Lilith, you dumbf*ck!" She snarled, crossing her arms. Lucifer blinked twice, not understanding what she meant.
"What's the difference!?" He shrugged, the alcohol evident in his system. "Eve, Lilith...same *hiccup* apples anyway...now let me taste your apples, dear." He mimicked the tickling noise as he got closer to her. She did not have a chance to say anything when Lucifer face-planted on her breast, making the motorboat sound.
"DRUNKEN IDIOT!" Lilith pushed him away and slapped it right into his cheek. The drunken king stumbled back a bit, shocked by her strength. He looked back at Serpent, who was poking his head under the couch. Smiles formed before they burst into laughter.
"Not a day has passed since Charlie left, and you've degraded into this! WHAT THE f*ck, Lucifer?!"
"Oh, you know...we decided to celebrate...*hiccup* and... how much we drank, Serpent?"
"Ughhh...." The drunken snake groaned, scratching his head with his tail. "69...no wait…that's sex position...um…5?...12?...what comes after 13, Helel?"
"16...I think" Lucifer replied in full confidence.
"Oh, right. It's 25, Lilith." Serpent nodded in all power.
Lilith slapped herself, so close to losing her patience. They were drunk enough to not know how to count.
"Alright, you miserable idiots!" She released her breath and looked at them with full anger. "I expect both of you-"
"UNHOLY-!" Serpent let out a hissy shriek when he realized Lucifer's gramophone had started to play the famous Finnish polka. "Luci, it's your jam! Let's us Siiii - *hiccup* -ng!"
"Yes, sir!" Lucifer gave a drunken salute.
"NO, DON'T!" Lilith demanded not to sing, but it was too late.
The Heavenly Polka
By Lucifer Morningstar and Serpent.
Lucifer's singing: normal text
Serpent's singing: italic text
Lucifer and Serpent in unison: Italic Bold Text
"The land of Heaven is only a beautiful memory,"
"but the music still sounds from the heart,"
"when the musician's fingers let you hear,"
"The Heavenly Polka!"
"That polka brings past times to mind"
"And creates a strange longing in the chest."
"Hey, musician, let the accordion play"
"the Heavenly Polka!"
"It takes the angels and the snakes to dancing,"
"nothing compares to that polka!"
"With it even living without a roof is"
"the Heavenly Polka!"
"It has the rippling of the waves,"
"it has the waver of the pine trees."
"Heaven sounds - everybody knows it -"
"the Heavenly Polka!"
"ENOUGH!" Lilith demanded, storming right into Lucifer's face. "You mister, had enough. Go to the bed or face-"
"SING WITH US, LILITH!" Lucifer grabbed her hands and pulled her closer, gripping her waist so that she could not escape. He made her dance to the rhythm of the song.
[Chorus]
"Come, come, Lilith, dance with me now,"
"When the polka jingles so delicately."
"Hoi! Let Sera lament and clench her teeth,"
"when we have larger freedom!"
"LET ME GO!" Lilith screamed as Lucifer spun her in their dance.
"Come, come, wife, dance with me now,"
"when we have joy and summerly weather!"
Lucifer let go of Lilith with a spin, causing her to crash against the display's cases with a loud crash.
"We have lost our Lilith,"
"but we still have the polka left!"
"When the dearest angels have been left behind,"
"a snake in a foreign place finds solace,"
"when listening to wistful music:"
"the Heavenly Polka!"
"It is the only polka, but the kind,"
"that leads to the path of memories."
"The sound of the beautiful Heaven is:"
the Heavenly Polka!
"It takes the angels and the snakes to dancing,"
"nothing compares to that polka!"
"With it even living without a roof is"
the Heavenly Polka!
"It has the rippling of the waves,"
"it has the waver of the pine trees."
"Heaven sounds - everybody knows it -"
"the Heavenly Polka!"
Serpent jumped at Lucifer's hands, wrapping his long body around them to improvise as they danced together.
[Chorus]
"Come, come, brother, dance with me now,"
"when the polka jingles so delicately."
"Hoi! Let Sera lament and clench her teeth,"
"when we have larger freedom!"
"Come, come, Serpent, dance with me now!"
"when we have joy and summerly weather!"
"We have lost Charlie,"
"But we still have the polka left!"
Finishing the song, Lucifer and Serpent collapsed to the floor, laughing their asses off. None of them expected them to sing the whole f*cking song together. As for Lilith...livid wasn't even the word to start with for Lilith.
Lucifer looked up and saw his wife had turned pale, her nails were as sharp as claws, and her horns were sharper than before. She raised her finger and pointed it at him in a dramatic motion.
"Lucifer Morningstar, I command you to get up -RIGHT NOW!"
At her last word, Lilith completely transformed into her full demon form. The Eden's Snake screamed in horror and crawled under the sofa in fear of the woman's anger. On the contrary, Lucifer only smiled at it.
"Oh, you're so prettier when you're angry."
Not giving a single thought to that, Lilith grabbed Lucifer by the ear and forced him to stand up, dragging him out of the living room.
"De f*ck you are doing, woman?"
"Sobering you up!" Lilith shouted as she took him out into the courtyard and straight to the fountain.
Lilith then grabbed her husband's hair and pushed his head straight into the freezing water of the fountain. It was only after at least 5 seconds that Lucifer realized that she was drowning him. So, he yelled for help, trying to beat off her hands. Lilith took it he was sober, and pulled his head out of the fountain. He gasped and coughed from the water.
"Honey...I never thought you're into this!" Lucifer took the chance to make a silly joke.
"Wrong response!" Lilith plunged his head into the cold water again. If Lucifer kept up with his bullsh*t, rest assured, they would be here all night. But after a few instances, Lucifer got the memo.
"Okay! OKAY! ENOUGH!" He begged.
This time, Lilith let go of him and returned to her normal form. Her anger is still present that is. Her husband wiped the drops from his face and raised a finger at her.
"How f*cking dare you! I am Lucifer Morningstar: The King-" Lucifer stopped when he felt nauseous. "King of...crap...I don't feel well..." In the end, he vomited straight onto his boots, forcing Lilith to back off a bit. "Damn you, Serpent. You are a piece of shi- ugh..."
Lucifer didn't have a chance to finish when he collapsed on the floor unconscious. Lilith did not even flinch from his impact. She knew he had passed out. It wasn't the first time he had gotten drunk and exhausted himself up to this point.
"For my sake, Lucifer..." Lilith shook her head in disappointment. But to add more salt to the wound, she approached and kneeled in front of her unconscious husband. "The King of the Outhouse is what you are, Morning Star. Good night, my dear."
She kissed her fingers and pressed them to Lucifer's cheek before returning inside. Lilith left him lying outside while the rain was still pouring. She could've given him a worse punishment, fitting for him...but she still loved that idiot no matter what.
And once again, Lilith found herself in the early days of their marriage.
...
Maybe she should had stayed in Heaven for this year...
